A Louse Dream

Last night as I slept, I dreamt part of my scalp left side middle area of about an inch, itched. As I scratched my head, I found a Louse. All I could think is… How do I have LICE!!! In the dream I was transported to a time when my First Grade class was all checked for lice. I was called out as having the bugs. I had to sit in the hall and wait for my mom to pick me up. I had to wait a long time. Horrible feeling, like there was something wrong with me… and you know…all I could think is… My head doesn't itch. I don't have lice. So… My mom took me to the health department and I was rechecked, only to find out that I never had Lice. Only a bad case of dandruff. I remember feeling Numb. Embarrassed. Empty. Sitting in that quiet hallway, alone. Quite the experience for a little 6 year old. 

In this dream, I felt all those emotions and wondered how the heck did I get these bugs. How did I not know or feel them sooner. How was I gonna walk in to a drug store and pick up Lice Shampoo and not feel like I have the Plague. I felt empty and let go of all my emotions. The only way to handle the bugs, is to just do it. Get it over with. 

In part of the dream, I wondered…How long can I get away with having the bugs before people begin to notice. Can I hide them? Can I go through my days with the bugs and be MYSELF? The answer is no. Hiding something is not the way for me. Covering up for another, is not the way for me. I cannot truly be my Self when a parasite is affecting my life. Lice travel from person to person. Before long, I would be spreading the parasite and causing problems in other lives because I did not handle the situation in my own life. 

This morning, I looked up the meaning of Louse Totem and found this.

 Louse(Totem) (Lice) -- Being sucked dry by too many responsibilities or torn in too many directions by well-meaning people, the louse is a message to withdraw and resist being pulled into situations we do not wish for ourselves. Lice are parasitic creatures that require a host in order to exist and indicates that we are either asking too much from others or they are asking too much of us. http://spiritwalkministry.com/spirit_guides/bug__critter_spirits

I do have allot of responsibilities.  I do feel pulled in many directions. Torn in my responsibilities and in what I want. I do cater to myself when possible and shut down emotionally when the parasites in life begin to suck. I forget myself and go through the motions. Some situations are not for me and now is the time for me to see the parasite and quit being a host. Once the host is dry, the parasite moves on. Consider this… How does PLEASING everyone benefit me? When I am dried up and unable to give….They (collectively) move on. 

Consider, "Well-Meaning" People. Yes, they do mean well. They really do. Remember, their meaning is not your meaning. Their need is not your need. Their reason for sucking you dry, has nothing to do with you. Release them. They will find a new host. They always do. 

Consider yourself. Are you asking for too much from another? Have you become the parasite? Look into your meaning. Look into your needs and release yourself into your life. 

Life is about lessons. Learning and creating a better you. Examine your life. Discover your Self. Deepen your ability to be a greater YOU!

Daily, I work on my Self. I want to be the best person, possible. To me and everyone I am associated with… 

I am not the Best Person, yet… I am a work in progress and I will always find the lessons life offers. 

Namaste

Dona