A Thousand Tears

A Thousand Tears
by Dona Lackey on Wednesday, August 18, 2010 at 1:07pm

I saw him as he is
I saw him in his true form
The reduction of his manhood haunts me
The reduction of his essence enlightens me
The form that he has taken is a disguise 
A hat to wear for a time
He is the shadow of a man who could be
The shadow of a man who is
The shade of his spirit haunts me tonight
The reality of his touch 
Pains me deep inside
I have cried a thousand tears for this man
I hoped in him
I marveled in him
I gave my blood for him to live
I became a raisin 
Shriveled and wrinkled
I let him suck my soul dry
Until I was barely living, I was dry
In dying, I live
In the dryness I sought water
Gaining moisture, I live
I live by my own hand of desire
I live in the light of love and mercy
I cannot give my life's blood to him again
Let him live because he wants to live
Let him gain the moisture of a thousand tears
And return them to me
So that I know
So that I understand who this man really is
Give me back my thousand tears of sorrow
Give me back the life I gave to you
I don't know how you are the man 
You say you are
In this moment, I hope
I hope that you become the man you have been fighting to become
I ache for you to become strength
I ache for you to know and understand mercy
To know and understand love
Understand love...


You can love a person and love them and love them and love them...and they do not have to return our love...The hardest part of loving another, is when you learn that you have been used and the love was in vain...

people live and people die, everyday...Choose your lover wisely...

The hardest part is in letting go...
When I love, I love with my whole heart and all of my being...
When you realize that the one you love does not return your love, it hurts...it cuts like a knife and the wound often stays open...
How do you heal a broken heart?
How do you allow the scab to fall away?
I believe the most important part of loving, is learning how to let go...
The love I feel for him is real
Just as real as my breath and my toes
The energy is alive and is circulating me
He knows that he hurt me
He knows that I still love him
He also knows that I do not want him in my life, ever again
I still cannot say his name without feeling like I shouldn't say his name
It lies as a curse within my mouth and I alter his name to keep from giving energy to the love that surrounds me.
I hope for him
To live his life in fullness and in love
As I will one day turn to loving another with my whole heart
For you see, my heart has been returned to me and now for the mystery...
Where the hell did I put that key so that my heart can be placed inside me...